Showing posts with label New Zealand. Show all posts
Showing posts with label New Zealand. Show all posts

Wednesday, September 23, 2026

Tango with Mamabear - somewhere in New Zealand

Wednesday, September 23, 2026 0

oldbearnews editor

Enjoy!! 

https://youtu.be/-9_itAFEWUQ




THE DANCE GOES ON

[Strong, unmistakable tango introduction — warm, elegant, theatrical. Establish the recurring tango melody immediately.]

VERSE 1

She knew the numbers, she knew the dates,
She knew when things began.
I knew the stories, I knew the roads,
And somehow we had a plan.
The world might say there’s a proper way
For a husband and a wife,
But we never paid much attention
To the rulebook of married life.

She brought home the pay cheque,
I nurtured the children at home,
She worked her day, I ran the house,
And neither danced alone.
She married one slightly crazy foreigner,
An Austrian by birth —
And little did she know back then
What else he'd bring to earth!

For thirty cousins came with him,
And family far and wide,
And somehow all those distant lives
Became part of our lives.

CHORUS

Sometimes we laugh, sometimes we tease,
Sometimes we disagree,
But somehow when the music plays
We find the steps we need.

We’re two people in our dance,
Two stories, one old tune,
Sometimes dancing close together,
Sometimes giving each other room.

And after all the years we’ve had,
There’s one thing I can say —
Whatever step tomorrow brings,
We’ll dance it anyway.

VERSE 2

Then Austria came calling,
With suitcases and plans,
Doris, Bernhard, Wilfried too,
And suddenly our hands
Were full of roads and memories,
And places they should see —
A little taste of New Zealand,
And all that it could be.

Two cars went down the highway,
One with you and one with me,
Visitors shared between us
As we headed off to see.

We didn't need to make it perfect,
We knew enough to start.
Some things were planned, some happened,
And some just played their part.

But mile by mile and day by day,
Through every bend and view,
We weren't just taking them around —
We were living it there too.

CHORUS

Sometimes we laugh, sometimes we tease,
Sometimes we disagree,
But somehow when the music plays
We find the steps we need.

We’re two people in our dance,
Two stories, one old tune,
Sometimes dancing close together,
Sometimes giving each other room.

And after all the years we’ve had,
There’s one thing I can say —
Whatever step tomorrow brings,
We’ll dance it anyway.

VERSE 3

There were mountains, lakes and highways,
New Zealand stretching wide,
A bungy jump at Queenstown
With excitement on each side.

Doris took the plunge that day,
While others watched below,
And somewhere in the laughter
We all found room to go.

Then came the Kingston Flyer,
With steam and smoke and sound —
Bernhard found the old train
And nearly disappeared around!

Te Anau brought its forests,
The lake beneath the sky,
And more adventures than we'd planned for
As the days went racing by.

And through it all, the two of us
Were part of every scene —
Not just guides for visitors,
But living in the dream.

SHORT TANGO INTERLUDE

[8–12 bars only. Let the main tango theme shine, with a brief dramatic pause before the vocals return.]

VERSE 4

The visitors went home again,
The photographs stayed near,
The roads became our memories,
And another year was here.

You kept the dates, I kept the tales,
We still know what to do —
A smile, a laugh, a little smooch...
Some things just carry through!

We've built a life from little things,
From family, work and miles,
From all those Austrian connections
And all the memories that smiled.

We've each got our own two feet,
Our own ideas, our own way,
We've challenged one another
And still we're here today.

And though the years may change the tune,
And slow our dancing feet,
We've always found our way again
Whenever our paths meet.

CHORUS

Sometimes we laugh, sometimes we tease,
Sometimes we disagree,
But somehow when the music plays
We find the steps we need.

We’re two people in our dance,
Two stories, one old tune,
Sometimes dancing close together,
Sometimes giving each other room.

And after all the years we’ve had,
There’s one thing I can say —
Whatever step tomorrow brings,
We’ll dance it anyway.

BRIDGE

You don't always follow me,
And I don't always lead.
Sometimes you change the rhythm
Before I know I need.

Sometimes I think I've got it right,
You think I've got it wrong,
Then one of us starts laughing
And we're dancing right along.

Sometimes the step is yours to choose,
Sometimes the step is mine,
And somehow both our separate ways
Still keep us in the line.

FINAL CHORUS

Sometimes we laugh, sometimes we tease,
Sometimes we disagree,
But somehow when the music plays
We find the steps we need.

We’re two people in our dance,
Two stories, one old tune,
Still dancing close together,
Still giving each other room.

And after all the years we’ve had,
There’s one thing I know is true —
The best part of this whole dance
Has always been with you.

CODA

The music may grow softer,
The road may change its view,
The steps may get a little slower,
But I'll still dance with you.

So take my hand, Mamabear,
There's still some road ahead.

We've got a few more dances
Before the last note's said.

And we keep on dancing together...

Into the sunset of years.

[Final tango theme returns — warm, romantic, recognizable, and allowed to resolve fully rather than being rushed.]





Have fun! bear print



Artificial brains compete with each other and the winner is ? ? ?

oldbearnews editor


Well - the fun continues - 

I gave Gemini and Chatgpt - some very specific instructions

Uploaded the hula image for reference

see -->


 and let the programs run and see what they come up with! 

Here is the result - side by side - and am not telling which is which!!

My question to you all - who did a better picture?

Who came to a closer rendering to the brief?? 


 

full briefing txt below:

Use the above image

– keep the car – delete everything else

Make a LP 45 cover – art deco style

Have iconic NZ scene in back ground – select from Queenstown or Mt cook or Milford sound or Mitre peak

Place car on roadside lay-by with loose gravel or sand showing tire marks in driving in – have letters still visible on car

Have a small table near front tire – on table place an old fashioned wind-up gramophone with LP music turning – and make sure there is clearly sound coming out of speaker – either with waves or jumbled notes

along table place two glasses of wine – one white the other red – about 75% full – along with a bottle of red wine – half empty – label to be “Chianti” One empty bottle beneath turntable, on floor haphazardly laying flat,  Place on the “stepside “ part of the car one SMALL ‘think breakfast’ plate  – with 3-4 slices of cheese – 3-4 slices of meat/salami -a small amount of grapes and one apple – its meant to be a snack not a full luncheon meal

Near rear wheel place a wicker type picnic basket – open with plates, cutlery , chopping board visible in their respective holders

In front of that scene place a couple – mid-30’s of age – dressed in ballroom gear pre wwwii in classic Tango style dancing to the music. Make sure it is clearly understood to be dancing movement

Add some red evening sky







Have fun! bear print

Monday, September 21, 2026

Celebrating Godzone

Monday, September 21, 2026 0

oldbearnews editor
The Lyrics!!!

yumm

 


# GOD'S OWN BACKYARD

## A Strauss-inspired New Zealand Waltz Duet

### LYRICS

[INTRO – ORCHESTRAL VIENNESE WALTZ]

[VERSE 1 – MALE]
We came down the long road where the green hills rise,
With wonder in our footsteps and wide-open skies.
Through rain-soaked forests where silver rivers run,
The mountains kept appearing, one after another, in the sun.

Glaciers caught the light like frozen rivers of blue,
And every turning road revealed another view.
There were clouds upon the mountains, mist across the trees,
And the great Southern landscape stretching out before the breeze.

[FEMALE]
We laughed at the weather, we shivered in the cold,
And watched the mountains change their colours as the day unfolded.
Somewhere beneath those peaks the ancient ice lay still —
A world made long before us, and beautiful still.

[TOGETHER – FIRST REFRAIN]
Oh, this is God's own backyard,
A garden wild and wide,
Where mountains touch the heavens
And oceans meet the tide.
From forest green to glacier blue,
From river, rock and sea —
Oh, what a wonderful world He made,
And what a place to be.

[INSTRUMENTAL WALTZ – STRINGS AND WOODWINDS]

[VERSE 2 – FEMALE]
There are lakes beneath the mountains,
Turquoise in the sun,
And roads that seem to wander
Just to see where they will run.
At Tekapo the evening
Turns the mountains gold,
And the little church grows quiet
As the changing light takes hold.

[MALE]
Then somewhere beyond the mountains
The southern lakes unfold,
With Queenstown shining brightly
And stories waiting to be told.
A gondola above us,
The river rushing free,
And every road and hillside
Becoming memory.

[FEMALE]
Then further south the landscape
Grows wilder, deep and green,
Where waterfalls come tumbling
Through places rarely seen.
And down among the forests
The tiny stars appear —
A thousand little glow-worms
Shining in the dark below us here.

[TOGETHER – SECOND REFRAIN]
Oh, this is God's own backyard,
A garden wild and wide,
Where mountains touch the heavens
And oceans meet the tide.
From alpine snow to rainforest,
From lake to southern sea —
Oh, what a wonderful world He made,
And gave these sights to us to see.

[INSTRUMENTAL WALTZ – BROAD ORCHESTRAL PASSAGE]

[BRIDGE – MALE]
And then the road runs onward
To the place where land runs out,
To Bluff and the southern ocean,
With Antarctica beyond.

[FEMALE]
And Catlins holds old forests
Where time seems to stand still,
Petrified trees remembering
A world beyond our will.

[MALE]
The sea keeps changing colour,
The waterfalls keep falling...

[FEMALE]
The birds keep singing softly,
And somewhere life is calling.

[MALE]
Dunedin by the harbour,
With echoes from Scotland by the sea...

[FEMALE]
And Moeraki's ancient stones
Lie waiting patiently.

[QUIETER – REFLECTIVE DUET]

[FEMALE]
And when the road grows quiet,
There is a little church beside the lake...

[MALE]
Where mountains fill the window
And the silence lets the heart awake.

[TOGETHER – SOFTLY]
No need for many words here,
No need to understand —
Sometimes beauty says enough
Without a human hand.

A mountain...
A river...
A lake beneath the sky...

And for a little moment
We simply wonder why
We were given eyes to see it,
And hearts to hold it dear.

[INSTRUMENTAL – WALTZ BUILDS GENTLY]

[FINAL REFRAIN – FULL DUET, BUILDING]
Oh, this is God's own backyard,
A garden wild and wide,
Where mountains touch the heavens
And oceans meet the tide.

From glacier white to rainforest green,
From alpine lake to sea,
From towering peaks to southern shores —
What a world He gave to see.

Oh, this is God's own backyard,
And every road we roam
May carry us beyond the horizon,
Yet somehow lead us home.

[ORCHESTRAL REPRISE – RETURN TO MAIN WALTZ THEME]

[CODA – MALE / FEMALE]

[MALE]
So raise a glass to mountains...

[FEMALE]
And rivers running free...

[MALE]
To friends who crossed an ocean...

[FEMALE]
And shared the road with me.

[MALE]
From Salzburg to the Southern Sea...

[FEMALE]
From there and back again...

[TOGETHER – SLOWING]
The road may end at Bluff,
But the memories never end.

God's own backyard...

God's own backyard...

[SOFTLY TOGETHER]
What a wonderful world.

[ORCHESTRA – FINAL WALTZ CADENCE]






Have fun! bear print

Sunday, September 20, 2026

Chatgpt and Gemini compete - and I win

Sunday, September 20, 2026 0

oldbearnews editor

Yeah - so It was interesting - same source - three different song versions - all thanks to "creative" chatGPT - which - next week will put through its paces yet again (for maybe a classical version?!)! Meanwhile - this is a lovely country and western song - LOVE how it tells a story!!!  with help from Gemini and Suno and a large 🍷🍷🍷🍷 - we manage to do a rough video here . . . . 

How does it resonate with you??? I know three folks who liked it!!!! Make that 4 with me!! 







Have fun! bear print


Friday, August 21, 2026

Salmon - tinned and from a hot country?!

Friday, August 21, 2026 0

oldbearnews editor
Yes - I know - I am an old dude - and a simpleton!

There are things that seem ok on the surface, and when you dig in - you scratch your head and ask - hows that work???

 

I love eating Salmon! 

Baked / fried / tinned / bbq - pure or flavored!!

Recently i went shopping and picked up a handful of tins - they act as a light 'snack' at lunch time! (btw - just as a tool to help loose weight - and that is not working)!  Scanning the label - (IF you are lucky) I saw - 'Made in Thailand'!

WHAT????

I know that Salmon are COLD-water fish!! Think Alaska or northern Norway or here down under - near Antarctica - or in NZ case - Cold glacial water rivers/lakes!

Last time I looked Thailand is a hot hot hot place in the Northern / Mid Pacific - no wait - that's in or next to the  Indian Ocean! And still a hot hot hot place!! 

Googles ---->  

AI Overview                 
Sealord does not raise or farm salmon in Thailand; instead, many of Sealord's ambient canned salmon and flavored salmon pocket products are processed and packaged in Thailand using imported fish ingredients.

Production and Sourcing Details

Origin of Fish: The salmon used in these lines is typically wild-caught Pink Salmon from North America/Alaska or farmed Atlantic salmon sourced from Sealord's subsidiary Petuna Aquaculture in Tasmania.

Processing Location: The raw or frozen fish is shipped to contract manufacturing facilities in Thailand (such as major Thai seafood and tuna processors) where it is cooked, flavored, canned, or pouched.

Product Examples: Items like Sealord Sensations flavored canned salmon and various Salmon Pockets explicitly state "Made in Thailand from imported and local ingredients" on the packaging. 

 

Please do understand - I am NOT picking on Sealord specifically - there are other fish making product firms also operating out of Thailand!

I just want to know why it is CHEAPER to raise/catch Salmon in Alaska - or Tasmania - THEN ship them fresh or frozen to Thailand - process - tins and all - THEN ship them to NZ for sale in super markets! 

What the hell . . . . .  

Does the difference in labor costs offset the transportation costs and then is STILL cheaper - compared with processing them in NZ or Australia  - or in USA - Alaska???? 

Must be - or why else would they do that??? 

 If they are caught in USA - then the shipping is just a 'red herring' as they would have to  be a on a one-way trip down under in any case! 

BUT the NZ or Tasmania salmon - shipped north and then back???? And still cheaper then having a processing facility here????? 

GO FIGURE 

That said - FRESH NZ Salmon - or frozen retails at around NZ $60/kg - so it is an expensive fish to eat!! I feel a trip to the McKenzie district coming up - not that they are cheaper at the source either - UNLESS you are a master fisher-person! I do have a rod - and so far the fish have shown their intelligence by staying away from my lures . . . . . 



Have fun! bear print

Friday, October 21, 2022

Travelling with Christ - Divine protection or just hocus pokus???

Friday, October 21, 2022 0

oldbearnews editor

 

Dang - or as our Aussie cousins would say - strewth!

It is an amazing place - New Zealand - or better Godzone!!  Purposely built by the old Dude up there to be his favorite playground - truly a paradise!  

To go from one end of the country - (yes I am excluding the 3rd Isle here) to the other - is just over 2000km.  As long and as far as it takes to swim from Auckland to Sydney - our nearest neighbor!!! Border hopping has a different meaning here!!

Since I moved here many many many years back - we have been blessed with the ability to travel - and travel we did! After all - it is my new home so it needs thorough examination / visiting / exploring! Not contend with exploring New Zealand we also had a few trips off-shore so to speak.  

Totals ---->        37670                                                      Trips in BM 1 & 2   
                                                                                                   19341    km
Euro trip        1987       17179 km         30338    In OE               7637    km
Oma/Liesl       2000        1661  km           7332    In NZ               
Euro trip        2002        5200   km                           
Euro trip        2008        4377   km                           
Doris & Co     2014        2413   km                        total all trips   
Aussie trip     2015        1111   km                           
Margit           2017        3258    km                        64648.3    km
Cook Islands 2018        100      km                           
Euro trip       2019        2371    km                            

Sorry Martina - i did not keep a log of our Trips here although I could 'guesstimate'!!  Also the trips / km's shown here do not include the various (holiday) trips in the various cars we have owned in past years gone by and B4 we owned the Bearmobile's! Certainly there were several trips to Auntie Rachel in Dunedin!! 

:P  Did you see the Cook Islands? ? ?   It has a 'round-trip' distance of 30km!! You could conceivably WALK around the entire Island inside a day!!

Suffice to say - this kiwi is a well traveled chap! Well over 60-thousand Kilometers and counting!!

The early years of our marriage were taken up with SAVINGS - house / children / car / and family trips back to Europe  - so less annual trips away inside New Zealand.  Later on it got easier and also more affordable - so again truly blessed that we can do this! You notice the years gone by - (with 2016 - that interruption with our son getting Leukemia) and of course 2019 started the china virus were EVERYTHING just stopped!! 

I used to own a mini - my first car - and promptly crashed it one night.  No harm done to life and limb - just some pride dented - oh and of-course the car needed a bit of panel beating!  That soon got upgraded to a Citroen!! LOVELY car - such soft suspension! A dream to drive long distance!!  Lots of fond memories owning this particular car!! Because I survived the Crash - I decided someone is indeed looking after me - and in response I 'decorated' the Citroen. I also had a tiny St. George Mini cross on a chain permanently hung in the car.  I had to sell it to get enough $$$ to be able to fly out to New Zealand and begin my voluntary work for the order of St. Steven. . . Imagine that - the price of the Airline tickets was half the cost of a new car!!!  (Lovely numbers to remember - am slightly number-dyslexic - so yeah)

 In between my brother had his crash which he did not survive and so his "spirit " travels with us at all times - he was the lucky sod who always found a car park right outside where he needed it no matter where or when - and ever since his passing - I have no problems myself - a change from earlier days were I struggled!!  Thanks Manfred!

Well - it is a quirk of mine and it took Mamabear a bit getting used to! Since those early days of that crash - I have ALWAYS had a cross in my vehicles!  Sometimes they were just little trinkets - and lately (seeing I am enjoying woodworking) some made from New Zealand Timber!!! 

Here is the little one that I super glued to the First Bear-mobile!!  The new owner has taken a shine to it as well - so I understand it is a permanent feature in the old Van!! 



Then of course - the new van needed one as well - so I  had it made one day (almost before we had bought the Van)  and again - it is fixed pretty good!!  

Which does go begging the question - hmmm WHAT was the question - strewth I lost my threads . . . .




 

NZ Rimu (the dark bit) and some Kauri - oiled and fixed!







Yeah - rambling along here - so urm - yeah that question! urm - does having a cross with you in your vehicle provide you with adequate protection (traveling with Christ so to speak) or is it all just hocus pokus????

Come to think of it - do I need an actual figurine on the cross, in order for it to work???   Seems very quiet (unlike Don Camillo) . . . 

Hmmmmm

What do you think????





Have fun! bear print






Friday, September 30, 2022

T h a t freezer door - was left open again

Friday, September 30, 2022 0


 

oldbearnews editor

 

 

 

hmmmm - I had previously posted about the door to the Freezer room being left open - and - yup; you guessed it - once that happens then it gets cold in good ol' New Zealand.

 

In case you missed it - the ol' dude up there had a ball when he separated Light from Darkness and water from soil and so forth!!  He created Earth and everything that is in it - or better on it!!  


Our little paradise New Zealand - is often called Godzone (or phonetic as I think of 'Gods-own')! If you think about it - it has literally everything you can find elsewhere on the planet. Fjords / Sandy Deserts / Rain forests / Alpine regions / Flat plateaus/ long deep cave systems/ braided rivers to stunning narrow gorges/ Glaciers that retreat and grow (long-term weather depending), a Lake district, Geothermal activity (speak mudpools and geysers Ala Yellowstone Nat. park), stunning white (AND Black) sandy beaches - some so remote you can sit there all day long and be a hermit, natural hot mineral rich clear water springs, and yes - some very large powerful earthquakes etc.  

New Zealand: Undoubtedly pretty but paradisaical? Perhaps not.  

In terms of weather you can have every possible scenario - from month long droughts to monsoon type of rain, from heat-waves to snow - blizzards, crazy Foehn-type winds (with wind speeds from 110 - 300km/hr) vs long days of calm.  At any given day you can go from hot Fan-bake (+30c) to ice cold-snap freeze (5c) in less then an hour!  Houses used to be built on piles for the simple reason that anywhere - anytime, some 100-150 mm of rain falling inside 10 hours can happen.

The above picture is from windy.com and as you can see - the air comes of the big chiller room aiming straight at NZ!! Luckily for those further north - by the time it gets past the central plateau it will have sufficiently warmed up, to the point where we call anyone living north of Auckland - "living in the the winter-less north".  

PS - did you notice the MINUS 63 Celsius in Antarctica????   :P  


All about New Zealand 

That cold air-mass can reach Brisbane (warming itself from the Tasman Sea) cooling them down to a "BALMY" 15 C !! It never reaches much further north - and we have friends in Darwin who say it is 30C year round - they just have a dry vs wet season!!! Ooooooh; to live in the Cook Islands where is a balmy 24 during a COLD day!!! :)

Anyhow - If you think you can design a landmass that can outdo NZ - feel free to get creative!  I happen to think that the Ol' Dude up there out-did himself and had a bit of fun with NZ and he just made it -- perfect!! 

Truly God-zone!!!



Have fun! bear print

Monday, December 18, 2017

Chemtrails in NZ and the magic password

Monday, December 18, 2017 0
oldbearnews editor


Yikes - seems that the source inside our Parliament has gotten cold feet so to speak.  Still - the cat, as said before, is out of the bag.  The other 4 people involved in the Government controlled program have now been discovered.  One enterprising reporter even went to the great length of plotting holidays and weekends away from home and matching with un-usual weather events in locations where any of us 5 "Guinea-pigs" were supposedly urm - holidaying!  I think from memory (in my case at least) he had a 20% accuracy).

As previously mentioned - our system consists of ringing '0800sunnytourist' and giving and a bunch of dates and gps nr's and voila.   OK - NOT so simple.  Some folks have contacted me and complained this is not working for them.  Of course not!!! What were you thinking???
Why would you think it was THAT simple????   There would have to be a number of checks and counter-checks!! Firstly you have to ring in, in or on about 2 weeks prior to your anticipated travel - in order to give the rest of the system time to swing into action.  It is no easy task to load the planes with the relevant anti-cloud-seeding material (and keep THAT secret)!!  The exact time to ring before hand will not be divulged - except to say it has to be  minutely accurate . . .   Then as some folks have found out - a series of other questions need to be answered or given.  One of them is (of course)  a password - a long and complicated string of characters which are not related to your dogs name or granny's birthday.
There is this little gadget we had been given that dials daily into the Big Mainframe of a
Supercomputer (supposedly located someplace in Virginia USA)  and downloads a newly generated 150 string password (that still will need to be decoded (firstly) and then translated into binary code (secondly) ) and THAT will then need to be given to our program - all in aid of the fact that every Tom, Dick and Harry will want to try the System and have a cloudless day and of course we want to avoid that!! Imagine if anyone could do that - we would never ever have any cloudy days let alone rain again - ever!!! Should you make a mistake in the trans-coding and miss a single zero in the long binary code you enter - everything will fail, and failures there have been.    Remembers vividly one very wet camp . . . . . *grins*

There was one further attempt to "disguise" this a little bit further - sadly the Pilots at the time got to cute and more or less gave the game away . . . .   they certainly had some fun in the skies.  Rather then diverting the attention it did draw more to it.    Their fate remains unknown
 to-date!






Have fun! bear print

Sunday, December 10, 2017

Chemtrails in New Zealand working the "other" way

Sunday, December 10, 2017 0
oldbearnews editor


It had to happen – eventually! I told them so– a long time ago! Anyone thinking that they can run a “secretly sanctioned”  “un-official” “totally black” and “off the books” government program is simply delusional.  Ohhhh I sure told them, and there is no satisfaction from saying “I told you so”
Sighs

Well – I guess the cat is out of the bag now.  Soon the full story will break in the news!  All hell will break loose, ok some media storm anyhow.  Once the secret, and as yet, un-named source inside the NZ Parliament will have done their final reveal.  The media are already circling, sniffing for a good story.  Might as well tell my part here, now.
The reason yours truly owns a campervan is not because we are enjoying the experience (ok, we are) however – it is part of the bigger secret.  See it goes something like this:
Many a year ago the NZ Government decided to engage in some research using Chemtrails! Shockingly! I know!! However it is not exactly what you thinking – rather then using it like our European cousins who are very busy in CLOUDING or better cloud-seeding the sky, the NZ researches were using it to CLEAR the clouds.

An example of the success can be seen here.

Still - I know – weird huh?!?!?!
 Anyhow – seems the reason they went down that particular track is that we have these (per annum) 1.6 million tourists flocking to our shores – visiting what is commonly known as “NZ – the Land of the Long White Cloud”!  Yes – long white cloud – and a long cloud it usually is. Given that we are near at the bottom of the Pacific Ocean we have more then enough of our fair share of clouds!! You can trust me on that one!  It would be much better if we had some clear skies – so that the tourists (and I guess the locals) can enjoy the gorgeous views better! Places where that would be beneficial would be for example: Lake Tekapo (with it’s famous Church) and Milford Sound, along with some places on the Westcoast and of course some places in the North Island – Taupo and Coromandel for example.  Our West coast in particular could do with a break from their long periods of rain! You have never seen rain until you visited our west Coast!!

So anyhow – the thinking went that if we could just clear the skies of clouds– just once in a while – that would benefit the locals and our tourists (better pictures – right?!)! So the NZ Government secretly invested in this new technology.  Seems they got the product right, after a bit of testing, and have now taken it one step further.  And this is where we (and seems five other couples in NZ) come into play. See - they wanted to keep this part very hush hush! They arranged a very shady deal with one of our banks to “loan” us some $$$ so that we can “pretend” to own a campervan.

I mean we are meant to be and present ourselves as just an ordinary Joe Citizen on the street while “owning” our own van.  Then once in a while we can disappear into some camping grounds.  All we have to do, is ring a secret telephone number (which can now be revealed as 0800sunnytourist) and give a date and some GPS numbers (of the camping ground we intend to visit).  The Camping ground would have to be under a (nominal) regular normal flight path. So far so good.

If you look hard enough you can just spot the regular Dunedin to Wellington flight path going from right to left - and leaving its anti-cloud spray behind.

Of course - Lake Tekapo is been flown over (near enough) with a regular Christchurch – Queenstown flight.  Kaikoura (were we currently are) is under the Dunedin and/or Christchurch to Wellington flight path.



Having started that process by ringing the 0800 number, – there would then be a special plane using that normal flight path and ‘dump’ its ‘cloud dispersing’ material into the atmosphere,  for the date as given per previous phone call – and yes yours truly is sitting in the camping ground right now, and can enjoy a clear blue sky!

You can imagine the possibilities with this system – yes?!?!?!  Imagine some tourist operators been given access to this system and time the arrival of their coaches - full of innocent tourists- say once a week at Lake Tekapo with its famous church or at Kaikoura or . . . . . !!! Or near the long suffering West-coast with its glaciers!  Indeed it has been suggested that the coasters could and most likely will make a deal with the Government and continue to have their usual rainy weekdays – but from Friday pm to Sunday afternoon enjoy a dry sunny day – courtesy of the new Government cloud dispersing program!! They do need a regular break from their daily rain! Who could and would enjoy days without end of rain, rain, and more rain????/


Anyhow - of course it does not always work – there still seem to be some glitches in the system.  Like yesterday we had success, while today – there are still white fluffy things to be seen. Something about atmospheric prevailing conditions.  Not sure – am not part of that part of the  project – everything is very compartmentalized.





All of this is meant to be very very hush hush.  Of course – like I said, it would happen eventually – the secret would be revealed to everyone! Trying to keep a secret in parliament is – well like holding back the incoming tide with your bear hands. Impossible!  So here we are – the rumors (and the planes)  are flying – the secret anonymous source is drip-feeding the news  (just wait until I get my hands on that person) and everyone will soon be in a bit of a flap.

All I can say is, that if they think we are going to hand back the Camper – they are dreaming!
Not going to happen.  So if you excuse me – I have to go and lounge round in the sun for a bit and look like a “normal” person – and best of all, all on the Government payroll too!


PS – for those who are wondering – it “might” explain why whenever we are going on holiday we have sunny days!! It could of course just be coincidental . . . . . then again – Mum’s the word!!



Have fun! bear print

Friday, December 5, 2014

Shocking news: Santa Claus’s true location revealed

Friday, December 5, 2014 0
oldbearnews editor



This intrepid reporter from time to time does strike gold.  Last year I was particularly lucky to see Santa on his trial run (Santa Claus been spotted chilling out.html)
I truly believed this to be the “once in a life time” lucky story to report.
Alas – lighting does strike twice.  I was after a story of the hard working Elfs. No, not the famous ones who featuring heavily in a recent released series of Lord of the Ring films – rather their smaller and lesser known and very rarely seen cousins.  Generally they are very small, have a pointy ear (which reminds me that I must ask them if they have relatives on a certain Vulcan planet next time I meet one) and oddly enough seem to be happy in green outfits. Green – go figure!!
In any case – after months and months of undercover work and following a careful laid out and often disguised trail – I managed to get in contact with one Elf. Eric House (name changed to protect his identity) had a story to tell, but he was a shrewd customer.  He told me that he worked for the ‘Elf and Safety’ department which had, so he said, a very deep dark black ops department – totally of the books. A department that reports to no one in particular and is totally free of restraints although I am sure Santa Claus at least has some oversight. This Elf and Safety department warrants further investigation, as it requires no paper trail or indeed any forms to be filled out for any of its activities. Approval is tacitly always given. Its primary mission is to lay false trails, mainly for us “humans”.
It seemed to work too for the last few hundred years with the location of Santa’s workshop generally presumed to be on the North Pole. The Norwegians first fell for the myth and from there it took off for the rest of the world. The myth spread by the Elfs went as follows:  The Vikings had this God Odin who was the precursor to the modern Santa Claus. According to myth, Odin rode his flying horse, Sleipnir (a precursor to Santa’s reindeer), who had eight legs. In the winter, Odin gave out both gifts and punishments, and children would fill their boots or stockings with treats for Sleipnir.  Naturally he had to live further North then the good folk of Scandinavia – in a forsaken and generally very cold place – in order so that he could not be found and make totally un-disturbed his toys etc.  Thus the legend of Santa Claus working and living on the North Pole was born. Any self-respective logical modern person of course would know that this could not be true.  For a start the “North pole” is on a floating ice shelf so any attempt to go underground in order to hide the business of toy making would be – well, met with a watery grave. It has also been known that from time to time the Ice shelf melts away!
Naturally I wanted to know more – specifically to confirm a theory which I had formed years earlier but could never be proven. The price for this information was several cups of Eggnog (apparently forbidden liquid nectar in the Claus household).   So Mr House, the Elf slowly divulged some secrets – and as more eggnog was offered and consumed more and more secrets came out.  The primary secret is that Santa Claus does not live on the famous North Pole, rather – wait for it, somewhere in Antarctica!!  This makes sense and confirms the aforementioned theory.   Antarctica is a continent almost twice the size of
Australia and we know how large and mostly empty that is.  Add in the lack of people, and it is very easy to get lost there, or in Santa’s case to hide a workshop/living quarters.  Now some of you will say – “but yeah we know he is not on the South Pole – given that we have a permanent team of scientists stationed down there”, and you know – you would be right. But why should he be on the South Pole given he has millions and millions and millions of Acers of space to use where no human is likely to set foot on?
So apart for the added security and anonymity, why is his workshop located in Antarctica?  It has EVERYTHING to do with international date lines. Consider that the first landmass to see the new sunrise is New Zealand and consider that the delivery of all presents are accomplished on 25th Dec it makes sense to fly his sleigh along the accepted air routes and along with the rising sun. Travelling in the opposite direction eg from Europe via Middle east then to the Pacific States would be counterproductive.  Living here in New Zealand we certainly appreciate being the first in line.  Who could forget the Fireworks displays on the turn of the millennium? I forgot how many tyimes we counted down to midnight. The only down side is that of course the Americas are the last on the delivery list – especially the South American countries.  However after a very long night of visiting every house, the by now I am sure tiered Reindeers, have just a tiny wee jump across the Southern Ocean and then can disappear back into Santa’s workshop somewhere in Antarctica. 
So Mr House – the elf - having spilled the secrets courtesy of some eggnogs, then made me swear an Elf oath on my life, that the only thing I could tell was the general gist of his story.  If Santa Claus ever found out which of his elf’s told this particular story he would be permanently banned into the gift dispatch division, which after a long life in the mysterious Elf & Safety black ops division is more like being in excile . 

Then again – I can’t help wondering if this was just another brilliantly conceived dark ops plan in order to confuse the real location of Santa’s workshop. Who knows??? And more importantly does it really matter?? Probably not.  The fact that there are more and more radar stations placed around the southern Hemisphere are pure coincidence and are there (I am assured by the local air force) to track weather phenomena.   
In any case – fingers crossed I was a good lad and Mr Santa Claus will stop by my place – a flying visit so to speak.  As for Mr House, the little green Elf – I never saw him again. . . . . .


 Have fun



 bear print

Sunday, October 26, 2014

Ancient art of a selfie

Sunday, October 26, 2014 0
oldbearnews editor
Selfies -

 you just can't escape them.  People from all over the world are taking selfies. They then upload them to Facebook or Twitter or any other of the myriad of social networking sites.
And you see Joe Public  in front of - well - anything anywhere.
The word is this is the latest craze.  Prior to film of course people had to use ink or chalk.  It is rumoured that Leonardo DaVinci painted the Mona Lisa from a reflection in his bedroom mirror - a very ancient way of taking a selfie.  Go further back and we get into cave paintings - but that would be taking things a bit too far . . . . . . .
Even Politicians get in on the act. I wish I got a Dollar for every selfie taken with our New Zealand Prime minister John Key during the recent election campaign!! I could retire I'm sure!!!
Actually I was positive that after the now famous Barack Obama selfie with the German Chancellor, it would die a natural death - but seems not so.
One of the reasons why I think they do not make good pics is because your arms are not long enough away from subject (your head) and most people are more worried about getting it right - thus not looking relaxed - or fake! The very LATEST trend is to have an ski pole type gadget that lets you extend your grip of the cellphone - and some weird release mechanism.  Actually come to think of it - what is wrong with asking someone to take a pic of you ?? 

Oh well - each generation to its own - not that this is a NEW thing.
Far from it.
Long before cellphones, we had creative ways to take a selfie.
As far back as Nov 1983 I owned a SLR camera and one of its great features was a timer button. Basically you selected the time and it would count down internally and then go click - took the picture.   Great for hoping onto the bed and looking all relaxed!! Way before that I had 2 other cameras - nothing flash like a SLR and I got VERY creative with the release mechanism.  It involved some tied down gear - a thin pencil type object and lots of string and weights and; well - a rather involved set-up with release mechanism that would - or ought to have - taken a pic of me.  Suffice to say that never really took of.  Poor Instamatic - it took a battering.
The other thing - in THOSE days we had film - nothing digital then and so you got your negatives and one set of prints after about 7-10 days of lab work.  Nothing of the instant sharing we have today.   A roll of film came in 24 or 36 exposures and cost  quit a bit - so usually you took time to set up your images - especially with focus and lightning and so forth. 
So I tossed round some ideas of how to take a picture of me and my new room and - eventually rigged up (well - moved across) a large mirror and - well - you see the result - :)  

Not much I could do about the late afternoon sun.  Hey come to think of it - I still had hair back then!!
I did print several copies and then snail-mailed them back to Austria from New Zealand. That took about 6 weeks via ship, till delivery was complete.

Now - these days nearly everything is digital and nearly everything has a lens attached and I was very fortunate to be given a hand-me down cellphone that did have a camera with it.  So on 1 Aug which is also International wear your scout scarf day - I wore mine and decided to be *cough* a modern man.
I took several photos and deleted 99% of them - till I got to this version. 



This folks - will be my first (in the modern digital age ) and my last  e v e r  selfie.
Not a great shot
In fact I would rate this as a louse picture and would be severely disappointed if this was on film!!













I did take one before - but it has been pointed out this is chaeting














ah well - have fun



  bear print
 
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