Name that Christmas carol - help needed

Yikes - I used to know all of the answers but have since forgotten them - can you fill in the blanks???? I kinda need the answers to use in a news letter . . . .

If you know the answer - PLEASE leave with the nr and answer in the comments section and I will put them in as they arrive.

1, Bleached Yule
White Christmas -- Bing Crosby

2, Castaneous-colored Seed Vesicated in a Conflagration
Chestnuts roasting on an open fire

3, Singular Yearning for the Twin Anterior Incisors
All I want for Christmas are my two front teeth?

4, Righteous Darkness
O Holy Night

5, Arrival Time2400 hrs - Weather Cloudless
It came upon a midnight clear ????

6, Loyal Followers Advance
O come all Ye faithful

7, Far Off in a Feeder
Away in a manger

8, Array the Corridor
Deck the Halls . . .

9, Bantam Male Percussionist
Little Drummer Boy

10, Monarchial Triad
The Three Kings of the orient

11, Nocturnal Noiselessness
Silent night

12, Jehovah Deactivate Blithe Chevaliers
God rest Ye merry Gentleman

13, Red Man En Route to Borough
Santa is coming to town

14, Frozen Precipitation Commence
Let it snow let it snow - Dean Martin / Bing Crosby

15, Proceed and Enlighten on the Pinnacle
Go tell it on the Mountain

16, The Quadruped with the Vermillion Proboscis
Rudolph the red nosed reindeer

17, Query Regarding Identity of Descendant
What child is this

18, Delight for this Planet
Joy to the world

19, Give Attention to the Melodious Celestial Beings
Hark the Herald Angels sing

20, The Dozen Festive 24-Hour Intervals
Twelve days of Christmas - my true love gave to me etc.

How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator?

Subject: R U a Pro?

The following short quiz consists of 4 questions and will tell you whether you are qualified to be a "professional."

1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator?

The correct answer is: Open the refrigerator, put in the giraffe, and close the door. This question tests whether you tend to do simple things in an overly complicated way.

2 How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator?

Did you say, "Open the refrigerator, put in the elephant, and close the refrigerator?" Wrong Answer.

Correct Answer: Open the refrigerator; take out the giraffe put in the elephant and close the door. This tests your ability to think through the repercussions of your previous actions.

3. The Lion King is hosting an animal conference. All the animals attend... except one ... Which animal does not attend?

Correct Answer: The Elephant. The elephant is in the refrigerator. You just put him in there. This tests your memory.

Okay even if you did not answer the first three questions correctly, you still have one more chance to show your true abilities.

4. There is a river you must cross but it is inhabited by crocodiles, and you do not have a boat. How do you manage it?

Correct Answer: You jump into the river and swim across. Have you not been listening? All the crocodiles are attending the Animal Meeting. This tests whether you learn quickly from your mistakes.

According to Anderson Consulting Worldwide, around 90% of the professionals they tested got all questions wrong, but many preschoolers got several correct answers. Anderson Consulting says this conclusively disproves the theory that most professionals have the brains of a four year old.

DW - I got almost all of them wrong and am happily considering my second child hood again - being 4 again is not so bad, no work , no chores , no worries . . . . .
How many did you get right ? ? ? ? Come on - be honest

No Gluehwein and missing it already

Sigh

Yesterday I was working on the computer and to brighten a dull moment I streamed radio from Bayern 3 live - one of my more favorite radio stations while I lived in Europe. (Do not let my sister hear that)
The radio jockey from the morning show announced that he had his FIRST gluehwein for the season and then proceeded to tell on how and where and commented on the yummmmm-iness.
And here is me sitting - admittedly in a cold southerly - rather then the supposed to be warm spring -- and drooling and MISSING it. I still can remember every occasion we went and had gluehwein last year during our trip!!!! There was a definite zing on the old heart strings.

We do have access to a g.-wein concentrate - just chuck boiling water at it and you get the almost real thing. ALMOST!!! It is not the same thing is it. Then I remembered how much weight I put on while over there - and that tempered my enthusiasm for wishing I could drink another one.

hmmm - come to think of it - we still have a bottle left, - ok brb - have to boil some water.

Ok my German and Austrian friends - what is the best way to drink Gluehwein??
Mit Kastanian??? Vor'm Kamin feuer?? Mit Speck??? Oder alle zusammen???

If Noah lived today!!

IF NOAH LIVED TODAY!!

And the Lord spoke to Noah and said, "In one year, I am going to make it and cover the whole earth with water until all flesh is destroyed. But I want you to save the righteous people and two of every kind of living thing on the earth. Therefore, I am commanding you to build an Ark."

In a flash of lightning, God delivered the specifications for an Ark. In fear and trembling, Noah took the plans and agreed to build the Ark. "Remember" said the Lord, "You must complete the Ark and bring everything aboard in one year."

Exactly one year later, fierce storm clouds covered the earth and all the seas of the earth went into a tumult. The Lord saw that Noah was sitting in his front yard weeping" Noah," He shouted. "Where is the Ark?"
"Lord, please forgive me! cried Noah. "I did my best, but there were big problems.
First, I had to get a permit for construction and your plans did not meet the specifications. I had to hire an engineering firm and redraw the plans. Then I got into a fight with Occupational Safety and Health people over whether or not the Ark needed a fire sprinkler system and flotation devices. Then my neighbour objected, claiming I was violating zoning ordinances building the Ark in my front yard, so I had to get a variance from city-planning directorate.

Then I had problems getting enough wood for the Ark, because there was a ban on cutting trees to protect the Spotted Owl. I finally convinced the Department of Forestry that I needed the wood to save the owls. However, the Department of Environmental Affairs won't let me catch any owls. So, no owls.

The carpenters formed a union and went out on strike. I had to negotiate settlement with the National Labour Relations Board before anyone would pick up a saw or a hammer. Now I have 16 carpenters on the Ark, but no owls.

When I started rounding up the other animals, I got sued by an animal group. They objected to me only taking two of each kind aboard. Just when I got the suit dismissed, the Department of Water Affairs notified me that I could not complete the Ark without filing an environmental impact assessment on your proposed flood. They didn't take very kindly to the idea that they had no jurisdiction over the conduct of the Creator of the universe.

Then the City Engineer demanded a map of the proposed new flood plain. I sent them a globe. Right now, I am trying to resolve a complaint filed with the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission that I am practicing discrimination by not taking godless, unbelieving people aboard.

The Receiver of Revenue has seized my assets, claiming that I'm building the Ark in preparation to flee the country to avoid paying taxes. I just got a notice from the Licensing Department that I owe them some kind of tax and failed to register the Ark as a "recreational watercraft."

Finally, the Constitutional Court issued an injunction against further construction of the Ark, saying that since God is flooding the earth, its a religious event and therefore unconstitutional. I really don't think I can finish the Ark for another five or six years" Noah wailed.


The sky began to clear, the sun began to shine and the seas began to calm. A rainbow arched across the sky. Noah looked up hopefully. "You mean you are not going to destroy the earth, Lord?" "No," said the Lord. "I don't have to. The government already has."

Noah's Ark

Everything I need to know about life I learned from Noah’s Ark.

1. Don’t miss the boat.

2. Remember that we are all in the same boat.

3. Plan ahead. It wasn’t raining when Noah built the Ark.

4. Stay fit. When you’re 600 years old, someone may ask you to do something really big.

5. Don’t listen to critics; just get on with the job that needs to be done.

6. Build your future on high ground.

7. For safety’s sake, travel in pairs.

8. Speed isn’t always an advantage. The snails were on board with the cheetahs.

9. When you’re stressed, float a while.

10. Remember, the Ark was built by amateurs: the Titanic by professionals.

11. No matter the storm, when you are with God there’s always a rainbow waiting.

The Price of having children . . .

The Price of having children . . .

The government recently calculated the cost of raising a child from birth to 18 and came up with $160,140 for a middle-income family. Talk about sticker shock! That doesn't even touch university education. For those with kids, that figure leads to wild fantasies about all the money we could have banked if not for (insert your child's name here). For others, that number might confirm the decision to remain childless.

But $160,140 isn't so bad if you break it down. It translates into:
$8,896.66 a year
$741.38 a month
$171.08 a week
That's a mere $24.44 a day!
Just over a dollar an hour.

Still, you might think the best financial advice says don't have children if you want to be "rich". It is just the opposite. What do your get for your $160,140?

Naming rights. First, middle, and last!
Butterfly kisses and Velcro hugs.
Endless wonder over rocks, ants, clouds, and warm cookies.
A hand to hold, usually covered with jam.
A partner for blowing bubbles, flying kites, building sandcastles, and skipping down the footpath in the pouring rain.
Someone to laugh yourself silly with, no matter what the boss said or how your shares performed that day.

For $160,140, you never have to grow up.

You get to finger-paint, play hide-and-seek, catch tadpoles and never stop believing in Santa Claus.
You have an excuse to keep: reading the Adventures of Piglet and Pooh, watching Saturday morning cartoons, going to Disney movies, and wishing on stars. You get to frame rainbows, hearts, and flowers under refrigerator magnets, and make Christmas mobiles, hand prints set in clay for Mother's Day, and cards with backward letters for Father's Day.
More love than your heart can hold.

For $160,140, there is no greater bang for your buck. You get to be a hero justfor retrieving a Frisbee off the garage roof, taking the training wheels off the bike, removing a splinter, filling the paddling pool, coaxing a wad of gum out of bangs, and coaching a soccer team that never wins but always gets treated to ice cream regardless.

You get a front row seat to history to witness the first step, first word, first bra, first date, and first time behind the wheel. You get to be immortal. You get another branch added to your family tree, and if you're lucky, a long list of limbs in your obituary called grandchildren. You get an education in psychology, nursing, criminal justice, communications,and human sexuality that no college can match. In the eyes of a child, you rank right up there with God, Santa Claus, The Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy. You have all the power to heal a boo-boo, scare away the monsters under the bed, patch a broken heart, police a slumber party, ground them forever, and love them without limits, so one day they will, like you, love without counting the cost!



HAVING said all that - I can wait a few years before Grandchildren arrive . . . .
What other reason can you add to make it a relative worthwhile expense????

Labour of another kind

Excitement rippled through the local community. Seems other beings LABOURED this weekend too. I was feeding my fish the usual morning time when a teeny wee bopper showed his tiny wee face amongst the foliage. Yes folks we have one very proud swordtail fish daddy - and I have counted three offspring (so far). They were happily cruising amongst the Java sword plants and are incredibly hard to spot.

Now how to keep my silvershark from eating the young and vulnerable????
Do I need to intervene in nature and start a re-housing project for some social "undesirables"???? Lets have a sub-committee meeting on that. :)


Post script - This morning (Thurs 29 Oct) during feeding time I saw 5 offspring competing for food - wohoooo

Labour Day in New Zeland

I was reflecting on last years Labour day! Mamabear was busy painting part of our frontage ( Labour-day 2008 ) and yes we have eagerly anticipated out trip to old snowy Austria and a white Christmas. This year Michael decided that the old concrete needed a good wash in order to "blend"in with the newly laid part from the front. It has to be said - Grandad does enjoy walking on the smooth surface and is less prone to falling over. So we took out the water blaster and set him up! What is it about Labour day - a day of workers rest - that we go and LABOUR - either in or out of our Properties????? Seems surreal at times. Anyhow Michael has done a decent job! (I think it was that GUN holding shotting action thing that motivated him - either that or the distraction of not having to clean his bedroom!!!!) I was contemplating if he will build his house with tiles floor to ceiling and once a year . . . . . . :)

Anyhow - it is spring - the birds are singing. the strawberries are fruiting and we are 2 months away from Christmas - eeeeeek.

Yeah its still a bit funny to have spring and Christmas together in one season.

Santa Claus rides in on a Harley Davidson

Yep - its spring - with all the usual dramas - first we have warmish days with all flowers blossoming - then we have cold weather - late ground frost etc. Tulips are out - and yes

SPOTTED WAS -

Santa Claus on his Harley Davidson in good old New Zealand doing early deliveries .

Seems Rudolph has joined the Red-Nose Union and is working strictly union hours - something about no flying with a cold or runny red and shiny nose.

Still - this just meant that our bearded fellow had to re-organize his busy schedule and find alternative means of transport - and hey, what a better way to travel all over the world then on a Harley Davidson.
Wonder if he manages to stop by my place???
Wonder if I can talk him of his bike . . . . . . . . .

Way to go Santa . . . . .

Annual Joti event for our scouts

Sigh - I must be getting old! We held the annual Joti event for our Scouts at the local school hall - joti meaning Jamboree on the Internet - where over and upwards of 5000 folks log on scoutlink and chat. Naturally this is a camp where sleep is precious and while I slept more then most - I am STILL knackered today.
Check some of the posts out here.

http://www.scoutsjoti2009.blogspot.com/

lol so tired I was, forgot to write more I did. Anyhow - while James has been rescued from thieving slave traders (as per above blog posting) I have been busy returning gear and running the next scout night.
Below are a number of pictures from camp
cheers
papabear

Why the Dinosaur died out

Says it all . . .. .

Teddybear on a food rampage

So it is a nice sunny blue dome day - not a cloud in the sky and it is Sunday - the day of rest and recreation. What is a married bear to do - he goes and visits the hardware store to buy some stuff *grunts* and buying we did. Some brush wood for the fence and a large pot for the miniature rose and other bits and pieces.
As there there is a brand spanking new McDonalds near Mamabears work - we decided to go for a snack - which I am ashamed to say ended up more like a food rampage. In New Zealand they have a temporary Angus Bull Beef burger - which tastes so so - BUT in the attached Mc-caffee there was also a Hazelnut caramel slice and a triple chocolate cheesecake slice. *Sigggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhss* ok folks - no smart comments about a bear heading into the winter and the need of building up the fat reserves - besides we are heading into spring - and summer. So I have tried to work it of by working in the garden.

Micky on the other hand is glued to his TV - Bathurst - Ford vs Holden.

It is T H E motor race in Australia!! 1000km round a street circuit - they should get dizzy going round and round and round . . . .